


Ed Knows Best?

by Prettywitchiusaka



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist (Anime 2003), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
Genre: Action/Adventure, Gen, Humor, Pre-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2017-08-06
Packaged: 2018-12-11 23:05:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11724447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Prettywitchiusaka/pseuds/Prettywitchiusaka
Summary: Edward Elric had been in plenty of sticky situations since he became a State Alchemist, but this one just might his most difficult challenge yet. Takes place in the 2003 universe.





	Ed Knows Best?

Edward Elric ran as fast as his legs could carry him through the decently lit cavern, a small army of well armed mercenaries were chasing after him and closing on him fast. If they were dogs, they would've been nipping at his feet by now.

The blonde let out a growl; it was times like this he wished his automail leg was a bit lighter, than he could be out running these goons in no time flat. But nope; he was stuck with this heavy machinery for a leg and a heavy satchel hanging off his shoulder, running for his life and dodging the occasional bullet.

To think, the day had started out so simple.

After learning of the possibility of a Philosopher's Stone being in the Eastern jungle, he and his younger brother, Alphonse took the next train out and began venturing the grassy terrain.

After walking for what felt like hours, they came across a village in the midst of their own crisis. For the last few weeks, their children had been disappearing, the villagers blaming it on some God of the Lost Celestial Stones.

Not that Ed cared. Being an alchemist, he never really believed in any of that religious nonsense. And besides, any trace of the Celestial Stones were lost to history as far as he knew. But when he and Al sat down to talk about it, he couldn't deny that his brother might be onto something when he pointed out the connection between the stones and the missing children.

So with help from the village chief's son, they began their long and arduous journey towards the old abandoned mine outside the village, reaching their destination by nightfall.

As luck would have it, they found the missing children in the enslavement of Allan Shire, an archeologist who was looking for the buried Celestial Stones. Unlike gemstones, Celestial Stones were said to be colourful, unbreakable stones forged from lava in the perpetually dormant volcano hardening over a few decades, meaning whoever found them would be swimming in cash in no time.

In other words, Allan was in it for the money, not the science, much to Ed's irritation.

And boy, was this guy an arrogant sleezeball, as he soon discovered. Turns out the village chief made an agreement with Allan to sell out the Elrics in exchange for his family's safety.

And to make matters worse, he'd given Allan all of the information regarding the Elric's that Ed told him. He knew everything about them; their weaknesses, their history with the military, even the secret behind their bodies.

He wasn't shy about rubbing it in their faces, either. Ed could remember when him and Al were caught. Allan just stood there, tall and mighty, smirking smugly before saying _"Well, would ya' look at that? I always heard the stories. Never imagine the Fullmetal Alchemist would actually a maimed little runt."_

That angered Ed, enough that he tried strangling the smug snake for insulting his height. But when Allan's goons pinned him down, he instead told him _"You won't get away with this!"_

Allan laughed. _"You still got some fight in ya', I like that; makes it more fun for me…"_ Crouching down to Edward's height, he said _"Bu, you see, the thing is…I can't have you interfering in my plans, kid."_

And he mean it. As soon as Allan's men had thrown them in the dungeon, they stripped Ed of his automail arm and Al his chalk, intending to kill them and the other children when the bombs lining the cave walls went off at sunrise and allowing Allan and his team a clean getaway.

Honestly, Ed didn't know which was worse; the fact that he'd been outsmarted by a self absorbed "archeologist", or that Allan was starting to remind him of a certain superior officer of his that irritated him to no end.

Lucky for them, the Chief's son felt bad for betraying his new friends. After helping them escape the Elrics and their new friend hatched a plan; Al would help free the kids and take them to safety, while Ed took care of Allan and his goons and got the stones away from them.

And that's how the young alchemist found himself in this position, running for his life as he usually did. "I just hope Al got those kids back to the village!" he muttered to himself.

He was really starting to get tired from all of this running, so the sooner he could get out of this cave and across the bridge to safety, the better.

And thankfully, he could finally see the blinding sunlight creeping in through a giant hole that was the exit. He might have been jumping for joy now if not for the row of guards blocking the exit, each of them holding sniper riffles and poised to shoot.

" _Not today!_ " Ed thought to himself.

Holding up the blade on his automail arm, he ran towards the row with a yell. The man he was running towards got ready to fire at the kid. But before he could react, the Fullmetal Alchemist did the unthinkable; he used the guy as a stepping stool and jumped over him. Landing on his feet like a well trained acrobat a few seconds later.

Then before any of the armed men could react, he clapped his hands together and transmuted a hole in the ground, causing them to fall in.

A Cheshire Cat grin on his face, he ran out and yelled "So long, suckers!"

With nothing to hold him back now, he ran across the bridge with a smirk; this was a sure getaway.

"You've done well, kid," Ed stopped in the middle of the bridge and looked up to see the man of the hour; Allan, himself. Looking quite confident for a man who was about to loose.

Heck, he even put out his hand and said "Now hand over the stones."

Hearing that, Ed snorted. "Come on, Allan. Just give up," he said. " In case you haven't noticed, your child slaves are gone and we've got the stones. By the time the military shows up, you'll be finished."

With a smirk still on his face, Allan let out a chuckle and said "You sure about that, kid?"

Hearing that, Ed raised an eyebrow in confusion. " _Now what is he planning?_ " he thought to himself. That is until he noticed that something, or someone was nowhere in sight. " _Wait a minute…Where's Al?_ "

"BROTHER!"

Looking up towards the gorge, Ed felt his heart beating faster at the sight of Al practically being dangled over the cliff. The only thing that kept him from falling to his doom was one of Allan's henchmen holding him by the hair on his helmet and one of his forearms.

" _Damnit!_ " Ed cursed. One wrong move and his brother was done for. He could survive a few alligators tearing him to pieces, but that giant ravine of water at the bottom would wash off his blood seal if he fell in.

"Now…," said Allan. All while tilting his hat up and smirking. "You were saying?"

"Let him go, you bastard!"

"Not until you give me the stones."

Turning his head around, Ed could see the trouble he was in now. Not only had the guards

from earlier caught up to him, but they were aiming their riffles at his forehead, too.

Well, Edward Elric was never one to give up so easy, so he did the only thing he could think to do; he took the bag containing the stones off his shoulder and dangled them over the bridge rope. "You want the stones!? Let him go!"

"Go ahead, kid," Allan replied. "We can always find them again…but I guarantee you the military won't find your remains so easily."

Edward let out a growl.

As much as he hated admitting it, he wished his superior, Colonel Roy Mustang was here. Sure, the guy was an arrogant jerk. But at least he knew how to turn around a situation like this and make it work in his favour.

What could Edward possibly do right now? Sure, he could come up with a plan, but that was easier said than done. Given their current predicament, every scenario he could think of ended with either him or Al dying.

Nothing short of giving Allan the stones would save their- " _Wait, that's it!_ " Ed realized. If he could outsmart this guy, than he could save Al and make a getaway in one fell swoop.

Of course, that did mean his brother would chew him out for the second part of his plan later. But what other choice did he have, right now?

So, the Fullmetal Alchemist let out a sigh. "Okay, fine." Holding the bag out to Allan, he said "Let's make a trade."

Allan's smirk widened. "Good."

As if on cue, the goon holding Al pulled him back onto solid ground and began walking towards the bridge, Allan in front. When they finally reached Edward, he wasted not time trying to assault them or anything like that. Instead, he gave the bag to the smug archeologist and walked over towards his brother.

"Sorry, brother," Al said. Despite the words coming out of his mouth, he was looking more like a little boy who just got his hand caught in the cookie jar than someone trying to apologize. "They jumped me."

"Don't worry about it…," Ed replied. Using the blade on his automail arm, he cut the ropes keeping his brother's hands together. "You're okay?"

"Yeah…"

"Good…,"

Now that he was free, Al took a moment to survey their surroundings. It didn't look good, what with Allan's goons poised to shoot them. But that was pretty normal for them, he reminded himself. The real question was how were they going to get out of this predicament?

"Gee, we really gout ourselves into trouble this-"

"Listen, Al," he heard Ed whisper. Looking down, he saw his brother staring at him stoically. "I want you to hold onto something. We're going for a bumpy ride."

"What?" Al asked while looking down at the rope, wondering what his brother could mean by "bumpy ride." Well that is until he put two and two together, than he let out a gasp. "Oh my

God! Are you serious!?"

"Just do it! Okay!?"

With a heavy sigh, Al did what his brother asked and started wrapping a piece of rope around his wrist, grumbling to himself the whole time.

Ed, meanwhile was wrapping a piece of rope around his wrist, as well, ready to put his plan into action. And just in time, too.

A few seconds later, he heard the familiar sound of someone clicking off the safety on a hand gun.

"So." Turning his head, he saw Allan looking as smug as ever. Pointing the gun at his temple. "Any last words before I kill you."

The Fullmetal Alchemist snorted. "Actually. If I was you? I'd start thinking about what you're gonna be saying at your court hearing."

"What?"

But the kid didn't answer him. Rather, he started hacking away at the ropes.

"What are you doing!?" Allan asked. Not that Ed cared, one more slice and they all fell down onto the bridge.

Not long after, the bridge snapped in two, causing both parties to start making their way

towards the rough looking cliff.

Ed kept his eyes shut tightly and his hands firmly on the rope. He could feel the wind blowing through his bangs and his hair braid, though that was pretty par for the course, he figured.

As long as he stayed calm and didn't panic, than everything would be alright. This would all be over in just a few seconds, he kept telling himself.

Of course, it didn't help that he could hear a certain someone next to him screaming his…well, voice out since Al no longer had any lungs to speak of.

Turning his head, he opened his eyes to see his brother, holding on for dear life and acting like they were done for.

"Oh, would you relax, Al! Just a few more seconds and we'll be-"

And that's when Ed felt his eyes widening. Not only were they heading for the side of the side of the gorge, there were also jagged rocks sticking out of it as well. Once they made impact with those rocks, it would crush the bridge and them in one fell swoop.

Now Ed was screaming. But not for long.

Acting as fast as he could he clapped his hands together, ready to transmute something once they were close enough and save their skins. He never got the chance.

Pretty soon, Ed became distracted by a familiar, blinding blue light not even ten inches from him. Turning his head, he saw where the light was coming from; it was Al. He had drawn a transmutation circle, turning the rope bridge into a metal one that would protect them from the impact of the rocks.

Closing his eyes, Ed braced for impact. In a matter of twenty seconds, the bridge hit the side of the cliff, making dents in the rock and saving them simultaneously.

Now that they were out of danger, Ed breathed a sigh of relief. Once again, his brother's quick thinking had saved their skins. Meaning they could relax for a bit.

"Brother, look!"

Or not!

Hearing Al's plea, Ed looked down and saw Allan and his goons falling down towards the ravine.

As if that wasn't bad enough, there was a pack of hungry crocodiles were waiting for them. Licking their lips in anticipation of their lunch.

Gasping, Ed leapt into action. It was certainly lucky for these guys that his monicure of the "Hero of the People" wasn't for nothing.

Clapping his hands together, the Fullmetal Alchemist placed them on the rock and pretty soon, a burst of bright light began radiating from the rock, working its way down until it stopped in the middle of the gorge.

The blue light them faded, leaving in its place a net being held up by fasteners in the shape of the young alchemist's head. The net caught Allan and his flunkies in time, allowing them all to avoid a gruesome death.

Ed couldn't help but stare at his handiwork in admiration; another job well done, he thought. That is, until he turned around saw his brother staring at him with an angry grimace. It's funny; even though Al had been without a moveable face these last few years, the blonde could always tell what his brother was thinking and feeling.

"What?"

"You know what! Do you have a death wish, or something!?"

"Well what did you **want** me to do!? They had guns pointed at my head!"

"Well you could've just transmuted something, you didn't have to put us all in danger!"

"Oh **sorry** for panicking!"

"This never would've happened if you'd let Major Armstrong come along with us like he

wanted!"

"He would've just made things worse and you know it!"

"He would've thought up a better battle strategy! That's for sure!"

"Oh **real** mature!"

The two brothers continued arguing amongst themselves, completely unaware that Allan and his goons were watching them in utter shock and disgust.

"Christ! Is that kid nuts, or something!?"

Allan laughed. "No…He seems more impulsive if you ask me."

He could feel his men's eyes settling on him, probably giving him a look of "really, boss?", but he didn't care. It'd been a long time since he'd had some fun on an expedition, and that reckless little alchemist had just given him the best thrill he'd had in awhile.

How could he not be thankful to him for that?

The End


End file.
